This is true life, painful story, and I’m sharing ‘cos I have been relieved. Funny how we can be mad and chase after the wind when we could just learn to enjoy the breeze. Anyways this blog is about my confession of my long term jealousy of a well known and respected woman. No, I’m not crazy, it’s just what I caught my self doing. Feel free to confess your sins in the comments too(LOL). I hope you learn like I did!
SPOILER ALERT!: We are besties now and she’s my woman crush today
You keep getting on my nerves
You are just an impossible match
Every single day, all I do is struggle to be YOU
I have read your biography more than a billion times
If you ask me, I could spit it word for word
It’s not a complicated textbook whose terms I can’t comprehend
Like a newly downloaded application, I have installed YOU in me
Unlike a lot of impatient people,
I took extra time to read every single line about YOUR rules before “accepting your terms and condition”
After all these, I still feel like I know little or nothing about YOU
I am so frustrated because you are a WOMAN like me and I still struggle to meet up with your standards, your beauty, devotion, compassion, business attitude, intelligence, discipline, education, talent, charisma, and even YOUR fashion sense
I have tried!!!
I have tried so hard!
Somedays, it looks like I am getting “there”,
other days, it’s just so hard.
Jealousy is beginning to eat me up like a sumptuous plate of Jollof rice!
I’m just wondering, is this another term for COMPETITION?
That’s not even the point!
I want to be like YOU, is that too much to aim at?
Look, I know this is creepy but I looked into your schedule and compared it with mine
but I ended up getting all stressed up when I found out my schedule is busier!
What exactly is my definition of BUSY?
What is the EXTRA I do that still didn’t get me to keep up with YOU?
Following your steps? trying to always fit into your cycle?, trying to fit into your sparkling “SHOES”?
This race just turns out to be in circles!
When I decide to take a break and see what’s up on social media
I see women like me tagging YOU again on their profile
Are there a lot of US in this race? have we made it so hard for you to decide who the winner is?
Looking at our lives truthfully, are we just trying to identify with who YOU ARE and faking the idea of US being called YOU?
Maybe we should have spent time looking on the inside to find our WHY or better still depend on the one who knows us more than we think we do!
What’s the point trying to fit in when we can soar?
What’s the essence of being called HER when we’ve been given a name?
What is the beauty of being unique when every one of us is trying to follow the same path?
Why didn’t I realize, Until HE told me;
“SHE is just an example of what a Godly woman should be”
I wasn’t made to be HER!
Now it makes much sense to me when HE says;
“You are fearfully, wonderfully and carefully made in GOD’S IMAGE, not HER image!”
His words are for me to learn
It’s my responsibility to be who HE has called me to be.
So, permit me to end this baseless competition, war, jealousy, the hatred I had for you; my sweet proverbs 31 woman
I will always respect, learn from you and most of all; LOVE YOU
Thanks for being yourself the whole time, One day at a time I will continue to enjoy being me too. You will always be my woman crush
ouch!! my feet hurt so bad from a long walk in YOUR SHOES!
Each of you must examine your own actions. Then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others. Assume your own responsibility. Galatians 6:4-5
Leave a Reply